1. You will always be under slept.
2. You won’t be able to hang out with all your friends; just the close few.
3. Having lots of friends is always cool. Meeting them occasionally is even better.
4. Coffee and tea are your best friends.
5. You will switch 2-3 jobs before finding the right one.
6. Do not settle for “I just don’t get time.” You need to make time.
7. Weekdays are for working hard. Weekends are not.
8. Your opinions matter. Speak up.
9. Your 20s are the best time to travel. You can save up for your mansion later.
10. Mondays are the devil’s child.
11. Nobody on Facebook is as happy as they look.
12. The hashtag “#nofilter” is code for “I’m naturally this pretty.” Don’t use it.
13. Watch TV shows that teach you something you didn’t know (House of Cards, The Newsroom, The Practice etc)
14. Keep a pet.
15. You have talents. Realize them.
16. Your wardrobe will always remain a mess.
17. To maintain old friendships, overlook their annoying habits.
18. Time spent alone by yourself is time well spent.
19. Everybody knows you’re smart. You don’t need to correct people’s grammar all the time.
20. If you miss someone, tell them.
21. Nutella is not the answer. A good run is.
22. Dancing in your room to 90’s pop music IS therapy. So’s screaming along with some rock n roll.
23. Binge eating on weekends is okay.
24. Exercise makes you happy.
25. Plans for the future almost always won’t workout. Live in the moment instead.
26. The “right person” doesn’t exist. He was just a Disney character.
27. Cousins have your back.
28. Fridays are a bundle of joy bestowed upon mankind by God.
29. Mind games should remain in high school.
30. If all else fails, The Beatles’ voice in your ear telling you to Let It Be should do it.
1. You will always be under slept.
From the movie of the same name. And I hate that this is how I feel.
I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair
I hate the way you drive my car
I hate it when you stare
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind
I hate you so much that it makes me sick
It even makes me ryhme
I hate the way you’re always right
I hate it when you lie
I hate it when you make me laugh
Even worse when you make me cry
I hate the way you’re not around
And the fact that you didn’t call
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.
Broadly, these make you a douche.
Do NOT wear sweaters and hoodies when it’s 27°C outside – because guess what douche bag? It’s NOT cold and everybody knows you were dying to bust out what you think are sexy winter clothing that hide your fat and make you look lean. They don’t. You’re not. Please stop.
Do NOT skid at the end of your brisk walk – I mean what is this? Do you think it makes you look more attractive when a grown man/woman skates across the room like a kangaroo high on crack? No it doesn’t. You not only look stupid but you remove all doubt that you actually are in fact stupid.
Do NOT stand on escalators – The whole point of an escalator is to make life easy and get you there faster. Even the word ‘escalator’ implies that so I do not even get the logic in this one. How about moving your obese ass and walking? How about not crowding on the escalator with your 40 million crying children? How about not looking irritated when I say “MOVE THAT FAT ASS AND LET ME THROUGH DOUCHE BAG!”
You are not above Bollywood movies – so don’t act like you are. You watch them, you enjoy them, you come home hoping your pathetic life was like a Bollywood movie and you try to copy the dance steps in the mirror even pretending there is wind in your hair. Therefore, before you sit and diss the shit out of a Bollywood movie and how much they suck, shut the fuck up and chaba on that chingam.
Do NOT apologize after sneezing – You have a lot of shit to be sorry about but sneezing is not one of them. Ever heard of an involuntary action, genius? Yeah that’s right, for once, this isn’t your fault so stop fucking saying “sorry.” What you do need to say is “excuse me” because it’s fucking rude to have your nose boogies flying across the room without so much as that.
Do NOT wish/congratulate your significant other on Facebook – Yes we know your husband/wife is God’s gift to mankind and that their farts smell like flowers and berries and that if they didn’t exist, your world would cease to exist too (which isn’t even scientifically possible but let’s not even go there). Nobody gives a shit. Same goes for babies. And cats. And your lunch.
Do NOT talk about how to lose weight when you know you won’t and don’t know how – Seriously, if you’re not going to do anything about it, then SHUT UP. Stop talking about ways to reduce that fat from your thighs as you down five Big Mac’s.
Do NOT be spineless – especially not this this particular decade of your life. Don’t want the job? Quit. Don’t want to marry the idiotic person your parents pick for you? Don’t. Don’t want two cubes of sugar in that coffee? Don’t want to be a sheep? Don’t want to attend your chacha’s brother -in-law’s son’s birthday? Actually have an opinion? How about GROW A SPINE AND SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF? Good.
Do NOT be pseudo intellectual/random/cool – Please just don’t. You will fail and fail miserably. All those random tweets you’re sending out with your mock humor trying to make yourself feel better by making non cool things cool is not working. Also all those facts you’re googling in trying to make yourself wordly aren’t working either. So stop and own you didn’t do A levels. Own you enjoyed Lollywood movies as a child. Own you secretly judge girls who wear skinny jeans (while wanting to wear them yourself). Just own yourself; the good and the bad.
I wrote you a letter I did not send
It was painted with my blazing hell and grief
My pain is my own to fend
But writing it brought some relief
I wrote you a letter I did not want
What I wanted was more than words
More than promises, hopes and haunt
More than all of the Worlds
I wrote you a letter I did not like
It bled, it soaked, it reeked
Of all the times we laughed and smiled
Of all the times weak
I wrote you a letter I did not send
One day, maybe, I will
So it tears apart what you have mend
To know I love you still.
I do not tire from tracing the lines of your face with my fingertips, dipping in the lows.
I do not tire from hearing your voice; every word, every sound, every smile you throw.
I do not tire from dancing with your ghost; the blisters on my feet go to show.
I do not tire of you, of all that you are. Please don’t tire of me. To me, that much you owe.
I do not understand the word ‘rebel’ or rather the usage of the word so freely.
You don’t agree with your parents. Rebel.
You listen to rock n roll. Rebel.
You aren’t married at 25. Rebel.
You don’t like to sit at home and stare at walls during weekends. Rebel.
You travel to another country to attend a concert. Rebel.
You don’t strike your t’s or dot your i’s. Rebel.
It keeps getting worse. The truth is (and you, who has been called a rebel several times, already know this) is that doing anything other than the prescribed and accepted norm of life is called rebellion. You may not have spent your entire life living by your own rules but thank god, one day you woke up and decided to. For this reason, the World likes to think of this as a “phase,” “period of acting out.” You and I both know that is not that. You have finally realized that it doesn’t make a goddamn difference if you dot your i’s or not. The word will still be read the same. You may choose to live your life a certain way, but in the end, you want happiness. Your way of getting there will not be a drag (or make you want to kill yourself in the process) for it is YOUR way.
I question every aspect of my life. Why not this way? Why should I care? Why should I judge? Why should I look? Why not? Repression is the worst way to live. We need to get out of the life our parents lived – they lived it, they were happy but they did it their way. Now it’s our turn.
Why do people insist on living in and coming to terms with Reality? It hurts, it pains and it leaves a solid, gaping hole for where your heart used to be. So, why must a part of us nag and tug at us to come to terms with and/or accept Reality? What is Reality, really? A sense of foreboding? Normalcy of life? Mediocrity? I suppose realities vary from person to person. In fact, I am quite sure that this is the case. Now let us get to the Reality’s prettier twin; Fantasy. Why not stay oblivious to what opinions the rest of the World holds of how you should live your life? What good will paying attention get you anyway? Approval from people you do not seek? Success in the eyes of those you do not value? You will be looked up upon by the World but when you look to self analyze yourself – you will fall short. Let me not derail from describing what this Fantasy really is. Fantasy is when you are liberated to see, feel, touch what you want without worrying about the consequences. We are too afraid to take a practical step – be it work, love, family – and therefore, we let our dreams and goals drop even before we muster the guts to say them out loud to ourselves. That is what living in Fantasy does not mean – you are liberated from your demons, insecurities and flaws. You walk, you stumble, you fall, you laugh and do it all over again. You are successful in your eyes and not the World’s. You know that you tried and you failed but at least you do not hold regrets that haunt you for life. Maybe you will fail and will have to embrace this “Reality” but at least you weren’t miserable – for a while. Weren’t pathetic – for a while. Weren’t average – for a while. Why I refer to the both as twins when I describe the two to be polar opposites is because Reality and Fantasy are imposters. It may be next to impossible for most of us, but can’t we turn our version of Fantasy into our Reality? I cannot answer that question yet myself, for I am still in the phase where I put my faith in all that I don’t believe in. Such as the rules of attraction – wherein when you want something really badly, you wish it, think positively about it and hope that the force of attraction bring it to you. Sounds completely irrational and insane, but what have you got to lose that you haven’t already? Is chasing what you want, but probably cannot get, stupidity? Or is it dedication? After throwing punches, swearing at the World, cursing your own presumed destiny, I am just going to let it be and hope that the lines between Reality and Fantasy merge along the way.